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When you hear the word "toddler" what image comes to mind? Definitely not neat, tidy and organized - toddlers and muddle seem to go hand in hand! But there are ways you can keep the havoc a toddler can create under control, without tantrums from either of you. Let's be honest about this, it's possible to clean up after a toddler the whole day long and still be facing a mess at bedtime. But think about this - isn't it much more practical to let mess fall where it will during the day and wait until day's end before you start to pick up the pieces. That compromise will give your toddler important freedom in her play; she can move between various games without fearing that they're going to be put away behind her. Try to be flexible about clearing up. If your toddler's in the middle of building a brick castle or setting up a doll's picnic, then don't insist that he has to put all his toys away just because it's evening. Carefully move the work-in-progress out of everyone's path and let him carry on where he left off the next day. If he's finished the project, but isn't ready to take it apart it yet, then respect his wish to keep it all together for a while. When it does come to clean up time, remember you're the one who wants everywhere to be tidy - your toddler isn't that bothered. It's only fair that you take on some of this chore. But make the cleaning up process a team effort. Try not to be overwhelmed by the havoc, and tackle one room or area at a time. Breaking down an enormous task into small pieces makes it less overwhelming and frustrating for you both. When your toddler's helping out, allocate her specific tasks one at a time, eg "Put Big Bird on the shelf, then put your cuddly llama next to him" rather than "pick up all your stuffed toys and put them on the shelf. Try to make the cleaning up process fun - rather than snapping at your toddler - "Put your toys away now!" why not suggest "it's time for the cars to go back to the garage now?" Challenging your toddler to a contest that he can win is another way to make tidying up fun, eg "Let's see who can put the most bricks in the tub by the time I count to ten!" Singing along to the work also makes it go more quickly. You can also make tidying into a learning experience - try teaching colors by saying, "You put away all the red toys, and I'll put away the green ones". Don't make work for yourselves - invest in some easy-to-reach child-friendly storage - low and open shelves, shallow bins and boxes, pegs that aren't out of arms reach. Avoid using one large toy chest as toys will sink to the depths and get broken which will result in tears and frustration when your toddler can't find what she's searching for. Finally - don't insist on perfection. If your toddler seems to thrive on mess and muddle (and most do!) don't insist she keep her own room absolutely immaculate. Make sure the rest of the house meets your standards, but allow a little flexibility in her own area.